Here I am again

Well, here I am again. Day phase one of the hardest but most effective diet I’ve ever tried. I’m filled with a sense of gladness even as there’s a gnawing in my stomach. My Sister has come to stay with us for a few weeks and has agreed to let us put her through a “boot camp” of sorts. It’s really exciting. Today is the first day so we weighed and measured ourselves which ultimately meant staring the ugly truth in the face. Our gluttony has cost us a dear price….. Self respect, confidence, energy, fashion, joy, and for me even in some ways a bit of the sweetness of marriage. That is far too dear a price to pay for a few moments of pleasure through eating something I think is yummy. The fact is that at this point, I’m not one of those people who can just have a few bites of something and be satisfied till the next holiday. I want a large piece and I want other things too. I know some people who can keep a tight reign on themselves and not waiver beyond 5 pounds. I pray that God would strengthen me to get to that place.
I want to be FREE! I don’t want to be a slave to my appetites. I want to look in the mirror and think “ok, I look good in that outfit” but you reach a point in weight gain that you never feel good in anything you put on and you look at the reflection of your profile as you walk by stores and think, “Wow, I look awful!” and “I don’t even recognize myself”.
By the Grace of a Mighty God, I will overcome. I will find victory in this area.